boX of ChocoLate

BULLIES SUCK!

2007-11-25T11:22:00.000+07:00

ARrrrrrGggghhhhh sorry to all the fans for not updating my blog for a really really long time....

havent really had time to update....eventhough got a lot of things to say....

Recently i just got promoted....WOO HOO....

But with the promotion, comes the hardship truth...

I now realize that BULLIES come in different form....at school, on the streets...and even in the workfield...

HmmmMMMmmMMMMppppfffff.....!!!

office party

2007-08-12T01:24:00.000+07:00

Ahhhhhhh....

Finally at home!

Just got home from the Big Boss' bday party at his place...

At first, the idea of going was quite a drag...aside from the fact that i'm kinda new in the company...

(oh, have i told u? I got a new job LOL...in the morning...still teaching afterwards)

Dunno everybody at the office aside from Julie, Annika, the rest of my team, and my AE...oh...Chorie aswell)

The idea of mingling was a drag...i just didnt feel like doing it...

But after She-Dad (Annika.red) persuaded me to go...so i went...

70s theme party...HELLO....not much of a THEME PARTY freak here...

BUT...

I kinda enjoyed the party...met new people...getting to know them...it was AIGHT!

I think at some point i realize that first impressions just never the thing to rely on...You tend to be misled by the whole thing...

They're....QUITE...ALRIGHT!
**regardless the depth of our relationship lol**

hehehhehehehehhehehehehhe....

If either of u read this.....NOW YOU KNOW!!!!!!!!!

HMMPPPPFFFFF

2007-08-09T20:31:00.000+07:00

Huaaaaaaaaaaahhhh.....

Finally...

a moment to actually write something...

been so caught up with work and no proper sleep....

A lot of things have happened during those times....

and i cant remember which is which.....

All i know is im trying to accept my content life as it is....

With less whinning about certain things....

hehehehhehehehheheeh....

CORNY!!!!!!!!!!!

BLOON

2007-07-17T23:44:00.000+07:00

Tak banyak yang bisa anda lakukan ketika anda mabok dengan kerjaan...dan mengantuk!

Jadi...Sok Cengo aja!

hehehhehehe

presenting V aka Vanessa Hudgens

2007-06-27T22:58:00.000+07:00

OK...one thing that my students told me that i had to watch high school musical...

hahahahhahahah...

watched it once....it was alright...saw a rising star there...

Ms.Vanessa Anne Hudgens, and i was so hooked on her new song...definately can relate to what she said there....LOL

You are fine
You are sweet
But I'm still a bit naive with my heart
When you're close I don't breathe
I can't find the words to speak
I feel sparks
But I don't wanna be into you
If you are not looking for true love, oh oh
No I don't wanna start seeing you
If I can't be your only one

So tell me when it's not alright
When it's not ok
Will you try to make me feel better?
Will you say alright? (say alright)
Will you say ok? (Say ok)
Will you stick with me through whatever?
Or run away
(Say that it's gonna be alright. That it's gonna be ok)
Say Ok.

When you call I don't know if I should pick up the phone every time
I'm not like all my friends who keep calling up the boys, I'm so shy
But I don't wanna be into you
If you don't treat me the right way
See I can only start seeing you
If you can make my heart feel safe (feel safe)

When it's not alright
When it's not ok
Will you try to make me feel better?
Will you say alright? (say alright)
Will you say ok? (Say ok)
Will you stick with me through whatever?
Or run away
(Say that it's gonna be alright. That it's gonna be ok
Don't run away, don't run away)
Let me know if it's gonna be you
Boy, you've got some things to prove
Let me know that you'll keep me safe
I don't want you to run away so
Let me know that you'll call on time
Let me know that you won't be shy
Will you wipe my tears away
Will you hold me closer
When it's not alright
When it's not ok
Will you try to make me feel better
Will you say alright? (say alright)
Will you say ok? (Say ok)
Will you stick with me through whatever?
Or run away
(Say that it's gonna be alright. That it's gonna be ok)
Say OK
(Don't run away, don't run away)
(Say that it's gonna be alright. That it's gonna be ok, don't run away)
Will you say OK
(Say that it's gonna be alright. That it's gonna be ok)

CRIMINAL MINDS, starworld Mondays at 9pm

2007-06-19T23:11:00.000+07:00

Remember PROFILER the TV SHOW?

Profiler was a story of an FBI agent (played by Ally Walker as Samantha Waters)who helped solve cases by analyzing behaviour or personality traits.

If u like profiler and CSI, u are going to love CRIMINAL MINDS, a mixture of Profiler and CSI.

CRIMINAL MINDS portrays the B.A.U. (Behaviourial Analysis unit) that is based in Quantico.

The Behaviorial Analysis Unit is composed of an elite team of FBI profilers who analyze the country's most twisted criminal minds and anticipate their next moves before they strike again.

Criminal Minds stars Mandy Patinkin as Senior Supervisory Special Agent Jason Gideon, Thomas Gibson as Unit Chief Aaron Hotchner, Paget Brewster as Supervisory Special Agent Emily Prentiss, Shemar Moore as Supervisory Special Agent Derek Morgan, Matthew Gray Gubler as Supervisory Special Agent Dr. Spencer Reid, AJ Cook as Supervisory Special Agent and Media Liaison Jennifer "JJ" Jareau and Kirsten Vangsness as Analyst Penelope Garcia.

MOVIE

2007-06-17T23:32:00.000+07:00

HAHHHHHHH....

Something that i have never done before...

Done with all my movie list this week...

FF, SHREK...Coklat Stroberi...

thanx to Baby, Tania, Nita, Ijal and Annika for the company!

LOL!

im waiting for Optimus Prime though.....

where are u AUTOBOTS???????????????

**transformers.red**

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

2007-06-07T23:51:00.000+07:00

HAHHHHHHHH....

Its been a long time...

Too Long actually...

Hibernating i assume...especially with all that's been happenin' throughout the whole month...

Just to make it clear...

**yes...i wasnt in a very social mood...

**yes...I hate all the third degree that everyone's been givin' me...

all i can say is...what I do...is NONE OF YER BEEZWHACK...

Regular questions:

1. Kok udah lama ngga ngobrol?
**coz i was busy taking care of myself thank u...and i dont have time for other people's drama...

2. Loe kaya nya sensi banget akhir2 ini?
**glad u noticed...now F-OFF....

3. Ciyeeehhh....yang sibuk ngedate sana sini...kenalin dong? progress nya gimana?
**again...need to know basis...and yes....NONE OF YER BEEZWHACK (thanx Dave for the catch phrase)

4. Loe lagi PMS ya? kaya nya ga mood ngomong ama gue?
**ehm...PUHLEASE...even without PMS, i can actually switch from 0 to BITCH in 2 seconds....LOL

5. Gimana T and roti Baguette?
**duh again...what da hell? mind your damn business...We're friends...not more than that and i love spending time with them....THATS IT!!!!

any further questions...

please refer to the FAQs above....and u know that u aint gettin any answer from me...

lame and pathetic...

2007-05-17T19:51:00.000+07:00

DAMN IT!!!
AFFIRMATIVE....

I went through a few things earlier...

and I have now discovered the things that had made me so repulsive....

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH...

1. I can mention a few actors/actresses and the names of spanish soap operas....better known as TELENOVELAS...

(thanx Rei....)

2. When i like someone, tend to scare them off by being too obvious...

(cmon, all they need to do is just twitch my ass a bit...and i'll be crawling over them....LOL)

3. When i Bitch about something...i bitch like no one else....

4. Now that i think of it, I have a lot of active dating/friends profiles.....

**internet WHOOOOOREEEEEEE**

hahahhahahahahahhahahahahahaha

see my point??!

ME

2007-05-15T18:50:00.000+07:00

Courtesy Mbak Beboooooy...

hauhauhuahuhauhauauahuah...

takes narcistic to a whole new different level...

GLORIA JEANS

2007-05-13T02:26:00.000+07:00

Aaaaahhhhhhh....

feels like ol times......

hanging out with the NjioNjias....

hehehehhehehhehehhehe.....

REJECTION

2007-05-03T01:09:00.000+07:00

TOBY the WIMP!

yeah....desperate and a wimp!

A few tips:

-When u like someone...GO FOR IT!!!! DOnt just stand there..

-David told me that, its better to try and fail than not to try at all....at least you learn something from it...

MY GOD....can i handle another rejection?

L.O.L

2007-04-28T01:04:00.000+07:00

hehehehhe jumat malem yang iseng...

waiting for Ms.Dina to fix her up with a new blouse..

got ourselves a good picture...in front of the fitting room!

YEY!!!!

LIARS liar pants ON FIRE!!!

2007-04-18T00:21:00.000+07:00

When u lie and u realize that u are lying at that time, I'm sure that u still have a conscience.

But, when u lie and u dont realize that u're lying or no regrets what so ever...

It probably means that U ARE A COMPULSIVE LIAR!

A compulsive liar is someone who lies and forgets about the reality i guess...it's in their GENS for some reason...

I've been scarred for life by people who lied to me...so to think that a friend who lies to u...certainly unforgiveable...even if u can forgive them, THE LIES would scar you for life...not knowing how to trust the people who lie to u....

LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES....

DAMAGE CONTROL!!!!!!

NEW

2007-04-15T23:15:00.000+07:00

Hehehehehe...

one thing that makes Baby, Mamie, and I arent a great group is....

WE INDULGE ourselves with IMPULSIVE buying!

and this time led to the picture u are looking at...

huhahahahahahhaha....

best times happens DURING shopping tentuNIA...

to choose or not to choose

2007-04-12T01:21:00.000+07:00

Talking to a friend via text, talking about his ridiculous problem called ROMANCE...

"Kenapa sih musti sekarang?" he asked.

and i replied,

"Well,it just happens when u least expected...cliche...but that how it works...thats what everybody keeps telling me!"

and I added,

"Masih bagus loe ada yang ngejar, nah gue...boro2 ada yang ngejar!"

and then my America's Next Top Model ringtone rang...

"Loe sih pilih-pilih..."

My God!!!!

How can I play CHOOSY or BE CHOOSY when I dont have people to choose from?

But funny thing is, THAT LINE...well, its not like its the first time i heard it...

My God...Being Choosy would be a gift, whereas the gift is not in my advantage...I mean, how can i be choosy? NO ONE WANTS ME!!!!!!

**venting my lungs out**

And venting like this, I'm sure Larry or Ben and maybe Bill would slap me....

hehehehehehehehhe....

HMMPPPPPFFFFFF..

my fave CSI teams

2007-04-12T00:51:00.000+07:00

My new passion...

My 2 favorite CSI teams...

CSI MIAMI DADE POLICE DEPARTMENT, with Lt.Horatio Caine, Lt.Calleigh DuQuesne, Detective Eric Delko, Detective Ryan Wolfe, Detective Frank Tripp, Natalia Boa Vista, and Doctor Alexx Woods.

CSI New York POLICE DEPARTMENT, with Det.Mac Taylor, Det. Stella Bonassera, Det. Danny Messer, Det. Lindsay Monroe, Dr. Sheldon Hawkes, and Det. Don Flack.

COMPLETELY HOOKED!!!!!!!

AH HAH

2007-04-09T23:33:00.000+07:00

Seorang teman dari Seattle yang gue kenal dari salah satu room, akhirnya memberanikan diri untuk ke Jakarta dengan upaya untuk bertemu seseorang yang dia kenal dari dunia maya...

Pertama kali dia ke Indonesia, we didnt get the chance to meet...karena dengan waktu yang cukup singkat dia menghabiskan waktu bersama seseorang itu yang masih remain nameless...

beberapa bulan kemudian, dia memutuskan untuk kembali ke jakarta for vacation dengan adik dan ayahnya...dan mempertemukan keluarganya dengan orang yang cukup mencuri hatinya...

Akhirnya Jim (nama temen gue) dan orang yang dia cintai itu....memutuskan untuk mengupayakan bagaimana si orang ini bisa pindah ke Seattle...untuk kerja...dan tinggal disana...

Hmmmpppppfffff....

jim took a chance to go to jkt....

the story just struck my head with reality check...

a moment of sigh

2007-04-08T23:22:00.000+07:00

10.45pm...

Heroes on starworld, CSI miami on AXN, and a couple of interesting shows on other channels...

Somehow...

I'm NUMB!

yeah...been having this NUMBness for the past week, trying to get pass it,and obviously what ever effort that did, couldnt see the result anywhere in sight.

A friend of mine (who happens to be a clairvoyant btw...remain nameless of course, but u know who u are hehehehe) told me that i need to focus on other aspect in my life (professionally and educationally...) where as the OTHER aspect (hence the romance department...yeah...still trying to figure out why that part always sucks the most!) remains "DARK and GLOOMY".

Ha ha HA hA...(a very sceptical tone of laugh)

**what else is new?**

and i asked him...

"Nothing at all? what about Froggy?"

Froggy...another word for a certain FRENCH persona that i've been tango-ing...in a more SIBBLING with Something in between, and yet enticing kinda relationship...

"NOPE!" he answered...FuBu maybe...but definately not there...

OK then! Not that i expect something more from this Frog, I know where we stand...so that answer didnt surprise me a bit...

and so what happen to the rest of my TANGOs? Still nothing?

WED? We talk everyday, we email everyday...well...not lately though...call once a week...not an easy thing for people who live quite on the opposite of the world.

JFC? Great conversation...great friend? and? NOTHING either?

Talked to Larry about the whole thing...and yes...he said things that pretty much cover the whole thing...the whole cliche...which were true...of course...
But knowing me...im not really good at handling cliches...I tend to avoid cliches...although sometimes CLICHEs are pretty much the answers to everything...

So right now...

I will enjoy my life...vicariously...through my own...

I will make better of myself...

I will think of nothing else than what Mr.Clairvoyant told me to do...

and knowing me...sometimes easier to talk than to actually do...

LOL!

QUESTIONS!

2007-04-03T14:53:00.000+07:00

Questions remain to be unanswered:

1. Why do people cheat?
WHy cant they just be thankful with what they have? is it too fundamentally EXCRUCIATING for them? How can they say they love their partners and yet they sleep around with other people?

2. POLYGAMY?
How can people who polygamized say that THEY can BE FAIR???
Fair for whom? What about their children? What variables do MEN consider besides their LIBIDO and the EGO to conquer WOMEN?

3. Bisexuality????
How can MEN say they're bisexual? How can they say they love their women and yet most of the time the SLEEP around with men?

4. Casual SEx?
How can people have casual sex with nothing attached? I mean, somehow and someway, emotions would be involved in it...there's no way that u would have sex with someone without even any emotional involvement?

or...

am i just being too NAIVE?!

OVER IT!

2007-03-29T23:29:00.000+07:00

"Over It"

I'm over your lies,
and I'm over your games.
I'm over you asking me,
when you know I'm not okay.
You call me at night,
and I pick up the phone.
And though you've been telling me,
I know you're not alone.
oh..

That's why
(your eyes)
I'm over it
(your smile)
I'm over it
(realize)
I'm over it
I'm over it
I'm over..

Wanting you,
to be wanting me.
No that ain't no way to be.
How I feel, read my lips,
because I'm so over..
Moving on, it's my time,
you never were a friend of mine.
Hurt at first, a little bit,
but now I'm so over.
I'm so over it..

I'm over your hands,
and I'm over your mouth.
Trying to drag me down,
and fill me with self-doubt.
oh..

That's why,
(your words)
I'm over it
(so sure)
I'm over it
(I'm not your girl)
I'm over it
I'm over it
I'm over...

Wanting you,
to be wanting me.
No that ain't no way to be.
How I feel, read my lips,
because I'm so over..
Moving on, it's my time,
you never were a friend of mine.
Hurt at first, a little bit,
but now I'm so over.
I'm so over it..

Don't call,
don't come by,
ain't no use,
don't ask me why,
you'll never change,
there'll be no more crying in the rain.

Wanting you,
to be wanting me.
No that ain't no way to be.
How I feel, read my lips,
because I'm so over..
Moving on, it's my time,
you never were a friend of mine.
Hurt at first, a little bit,
but now I'm so over.
I'm so over it..

I'm so over it....
I'm over it....

Wanting you,
to be wanting me.
No that ain't no way to be.
How I feel, read my lips,
because I'm so over..
Moving on, it's my time,
you never were a friend of mine.
Hurt at first, a little bit,
but now I'm so over.
I'm so over it..

YEAH....i know the feeling,Kat!

HAIRDO

2007-03-26T21:08:00.000+07:00

New hair do...

figure i needed a change...and to get rid of bad luck...

any comments?

hehehehehe

FUN WEEKEND!

2007-03-25T04:20:00.000+07:00

Yey...

a fine group of people...great people to hang out with...to talk to...

Additional people to spice up my life that hasnt been in TOP shape lately...

all the sh*tty talk...FUN FUN FUN!

and thanx to a certain friend who is visiting Jakarta (Hary Carpijanto...hey i spelt it right,didnt i?), came this fun pics...

Minus Mbak Deisy, Ameth, Brahmie, Fandy, Avinkeu, Cici-ku who were able to join us the day before...

thats all i need...the meaningless FUN conversation!

thanx for a great MOOD-LIFTER weekend,guys!

Detective (rank III) Calleigh DuQuesne

2007-03-22T22:35:00.000+07:00

Born in rural Louisiana, Calleigh Duquesne is a southern woman with a strong, proud center. Growing up in the home of her alcoholic father, Kenwall "Duke" Duquesne, Calleigh was forced to take on an adult role when just a child. She had to give support to her numb, withdrawn mother, but also picked up the pieces that her father continually left behind. Though Calleigh has risen above her family issues, they still inform her life and sensibilities.

Driven to succeed, sometimes at all costs, Calleigh was valedictorian of her high school class. During one of her father's many dry spells, Calleigh decided that attending an out of state college would be in everyone's best interests. Though she had to settle for salutatorian of her college class, it was there that she mastered the sciences and made the decision to apply her experience in the field of law enforcement.

After graduation, Calleigh walked a beat for the New Orleans Police Department, and her impressive knowledge of firearms gained her a reputation as the "bullet girl." Word of her talents traveled to Miami, where Horatio Caine was in need of a ballistics expert.

though she has learned to trust her co-workers with her very life, trust has been much more elusive in her personal relationships. Having lost one ex-boyfriend to suicide, and another potential boyfriend to a woman determined to take down the entire lab, Calleigh walks with caution. Her heart is not an easy place to penetrate.

Calleigh has proven that talent and beauty are a potent combination. Though she often uses her charm to break down barriers, Calleigh always relies on her calm rationale to get to the heart of the crime. In the end, all that matters is that justice is served.

MOODSWING goin SOUTH!

2007-03-21T23:26:00.000+07:00

See the picture?!

Well, took it lastnite...

and everybody knows about the whole LEFT SIDE picture thing too...

I smile like there's no tomorrow...

**to Larry Fitz,a friend who has been giving me great reviews about myself...STOP IT!!!!**

LOL!

But little that people know, that behind the smile...lies a great deal of secrets which most would not understand...

I may be smiling, but i get hurt...i cry...I break down in tears...

A lot of people think that I have a strong exterior, a bit cynical and sarcastic...sometimes HEARTLESS...but not so much...hehehehehehe...

But interior wise...too fragile even with the bubblewraps...

hehehehehehe...

sorry, this was never meant to be a venting session!

STARF**Ks

2007-03-18T00:13:00.000+07:00

yeah yeah...

We go to starbucks...we follow the trend...

we dont necessarily drink coffee though....

but yeah...

hehehehhehehehehehe...

a fine nite of bitchin...

we're your dreamGIRLS,BooooYYYy!

2007-03-16T23:33:00.000+07:00

thank god for the whole lunch thing with baby....and ketemu herry di pim!!

AKHIRNYA GUE NONTON DREAMGIRLS!!!!

and seperti Bang Wisanggeni Restoto dan CiCi WeiLs bilang...

AWESOME!!!!

no wonder ms.Hudson won the oscar, BAFTA, SAG and Golden Globe!

SHe was PHENOMENAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

STUPID!

2007-03-14T10:31:00.000+07:00

We all have our moment of stupidity once in awhile....

Everyone has that moment....

and sometimes, it all comes when LOVE/ROMANCE is involved in the middle....

It's sooo ironic that we call love as something great and beautiful...

but at the same time, it can be deadly and consuming....

Unbelievable--Craig David

2007-03-12T00:32:00.000+07:00

Always said I would know where to find love,

Always thought I'd be ready and strong enough,

But some times I just felt I could give up.

But you came and changed my whole world now,

I'm somewhere I've never been before.

Now I see, what love means.

[Chorus]

It's so unbelievable,

And I don't want to let it go,

Something so beautiful,

Flowing down like a waterfall.

I feel like you've always been,

Forever a part of me.

And it's so unbelievable to finally be in love,

Somewhere I'd never thought I'd be.

In my heart, in my head, it's so clear now,

Hold my hand you've got nothing to fear now,

I was lost and you've rescued me some how-.

I'm alive, I'm in love you complete me,

And I've never been here before.

Now I see, what love means.

[Chorus]

When I think of what I have, and this chance I nearly lost,

I cant help but break down, and cry.

Ohh yeah, break down and cry.

[Chorus]

Now I see, what love means

Dont really like Craig David, his songs can be so corny and too sexist sometimes...

But this songs has been playing over and over and over again in the car...hehehhehe

CONSUMED!

2007-03-11T15:46:00.000+07:00

Have you ever felt so consumed by your own bestfriend?

have you ever felt used by your own bestfriend?

have you ever felt that what u get isn't exactly balanced with what you have given?

Have u ever felt that your friendship is quite EMOTIONALLY EXHAUSTING?

SO TIRED!

Please let this day over with...QUICKLY!!!!

TAGGED by mr.Rush

2007-03-08T00:11:00.000+07:00

OK....

I have just been tagged by Mr.Rush from Malaysia....

And I have to give out 6 weird things about myself...damn!!!!!!!!

and afterwards, i have to nominate 6 names that would be so kindly enough to post their own weird things about themselves...

OK....

HERE GOES:

1.as people (aka My bestfriends) would know, that i always take picture from the left side...because that's my best side for some reason, and the fact that i had lost one tooth on the right side (LOL!)...

2.Whenever I upload my pictures on my friendster (tobytha@yahoo.com...u may add it if u like!), i make sure that i would be on the right side of the pic,cause friendster cuts the left side...so....I sometimes FLIP my pictures...hehehehehhehe...

3.Pretty much the same like Mr.Rush...cant seem to keep away from the underwear department...hahahhahhahahaha...got variety of colours and models...from the skimpy to the HOOD style...(LOL...again!)

4.I need to watch TV at least 8 hours a day,dunno why...and I was always..and still am....interested with strong women characters, such as Diana Prince AKA Wonder Woman, Charlie's Angels (Jill, Sabrina, Kelly, Tiffany, Kris, Julie, DYlan, Nat, Alex), Caitlin O Shannesy & Jo Santini (Airwolf), Margo Vincent (Soldier of Fortune), Lt.Stephanie Holden & Alex Ryker (Baywatch), Calleigh DuQuesne (CSI Miami), SPecial Agent Megan Reeves (Numbers), and many more...

5. This may sound really weird, but it's not intentional...Whenever my relationship went sour or break up, suddenly I'm urged to buy a new simcard for my phone...

6.I cant seem to hold myself...whenever i see a free internet.....hahahahahahha...
I am an internet whore!!!!!!

So yeah....the six weird things....and i can still come up with 10 more, Rush!!!

hahahahahahahahah....

Ok, the nominees are:

Mr.HaRy in Cambodia...yang mau pulang tgl.15...yey!
Piter si calon dokter...
SanDy...U know WHO U r...
Koko Kardi...
Dody Priambodo...coba dikerjain nih...
Syahid Gordon Schaab AKA Sacha The Nomad...u better do this!

SH*T happens!

2007-03-05T12:35:00.000+07:00

Sabtu Lunch bersama temen2 kampus:

"Ahhhhh bohong loe????? jadi si R itu adalah pacarnya N Menshealth itu????" takjub denger cerita dari SOna.

"Lho, emang kenapa?" tanya Sona.

"Well, other than the fact bahwa si N itu kencan bersama temen gue minggu lalu....dan emang sih....kayanya tuh orang terlihat penipu kelas kakap berasa penting deh!" gue berusaha menjelaskan sedetil-detil nya.

dan Sona pun kaget...

N itu seorang swinger...well, obviously definately bukan Romance material!

Question now, how do I tell temen gue?

SMS Laode Hartanto dan Rio Kaunang...

"N itu ternyata either masih punya pacar, atau baru putus aja gitu sebulan yang lalu dengan pacarnya yang udah tinggal bareng,so do we tell Adhit?"

Malem Minggu, setelah dinner bersama nyokap dan adik-adik gue, Rio nelfon ngajak ketemuan...tapi bingung dimana, sampe tiba-tiba Anak-anak rasuna itu bilang pada mau ke patiunus untuk cari makan setelah dari Java Jazz...

Bersama si kutu, gue meluncur kesana...

I discussed everything with the 2 bunnies...and Adhit ended up pulang sama gue!

"Gimana si Menshealth?" tanya gue.

"Well, gitu-gitu aja...." kata dia.

"Ehm...dia baru putus ama pacarnya yang udah tinggal bareng kira-kira sebulan yang lalu." langsung gue tembak.

"Oh iya, gue tau kok..." kata Adhit.

"ehm...bo....sutralah...obviously....dia banyak ngga jujur nya,loe mau?" tanya dia.

"Oh tenang hari ini pointnya kok, dia ga jujur ama gue!" katanya.

Adhit jelasin kalo si N itu bilang malem ini ngga bisa makan bareng karena dia harus wawancara Joko Anwar sebelum Joko Anwar pergi ke India. (Joko Anwar the movie director and so on....)

"ehm terus, dia tanya gue kenal Joko apa ngga...dan ga tau kenapa gue bilang TIDAK!"
kata Adhit.

WHich in fact, kami kenal dengan Abang (aka Joko)...

SNEAKY MOVE!!! I LIKE IT!!!

"Ya udah, gue suruh aja Chorie nelfon Abang itu nanya bener apa ngga dia bakal diinterview...dan kata Chorie...TINTAAAA!" penjelasan Adhit yang cukup.

Well....obviously...banyak banget orang yang ngga jujur...

tapi cukup membuat gue bingung, dari tampilan sih dia bukan tipe-tipe orang yang jahat kok...but...somehow, kok ya...lebih jahat dari LUCIFER himself?

(Lucifer, titisan iblis neraka...panggilan untuk mantanku!)

hmmmppppppfffffff.....

well......shit happens to good people....that's for sure!

;-p

2007-02-28T15:44:00.000+07:00

iseng ahhhhhh...

JEN HUDSON!!!!

2007-02-26T12:56:00.000+07:00

CONGRATULATIONS TO MY GIRL

Ms.Jennifer Hudson, best supporting actress!!!!!!

U GOT YERSELF AN OSCAR,GIRL!!!!

Kisser/Cynical!

2007-02-24T01:26:00.000+07:00

Your Kissing Technique Is: Perfect

Your kissing technique is amazing - and you know it.

You have the confidence to make the first move.

And you always seem to know what kissing style is going to work best.

Sometimes you're passionate, sometimes you're a tease. And you're always amazing!

Are You a Good Kisser?

You Are 52% Cynical

Yes, you are cynical, but more than anything, you're a realist.

You see what's screwed up in the world, but you also take time to remember what's right.

How Cynical Are You?

akhirnya aku bisa memasukkan hal hal menarik dalam friendster ku!

huahuahuahuahuahuahuahuahuahuaau.....

valentine's dinner

2007-02-20T12:56:00.000+07:00

At least I got them on valentine's!!!

THE HOLIDAY

2007-02-18T21:17:00.000+07:00

MY GOD!!!!!!

IT IS SOOOOOOOOO MEEE!!!!

Cammy and Kate, U have portrayed every breakup, every heartbreak, and every heartache....

Blog for the heartache

2007-02-18T21:15:00.000+07:00

Ok...

Here's the thing about irony....

It irritates you the most to the very core....

and having your life put to the test, really gets you in the nerves....

REJECTIONS?! Pretty much my middle name....hahahahahahaha....

but somehow, my irony works perfectly in those situations....

My worldwide fan-based.....LOL!

But, u can never get to wonder, how people in the vicinity REJECTED me...and people in the world think I'm a God....well not a GOd per-say...just a GOODLOOKING BLOKE!

(not that im too confident....GOD KNOWS, im not....PAID MY DUES!)

It's hard really....at some point, u feel so inadequate (well, due to the fact that 2 of ex's cheated on me a few times, doesnt help too! but then again i dont talk to them!)

and yet....people out there just....raise u up....in so many different ways......

THIS BLOG GOES OUT TO U ALL OUT THERE....

THANX FORRRRRR THE HUGS N KISSES!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahahhaahahahahha

February 14th!!!!!!

2007-02-13T22:07:00.000+07:00

RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!

Like i really need this day...this VALENTINE to remind me how pathetic my love life is?????!!!!!

DONT THINK SO!!!!

so....F**K the DAMN DAY!

orang orang aneh

2007-02-12T11:50:00.000+07:00

Orang orang yang ga ada kerjaan di hari minggu!

SIGH!

2007-02-11T00:56:00.000+07:00

what da hell am i looking at?

Oh yes....my non-existent life!

ALL HELL BREAKS LOSE!

2007-02-07T14:12:00.000+07:00

Story of the week....

I have become A HOE!!!!

yes...u heard me....HOE....a WHORE....who sold his soul to the devil....the FROGS!

(damn them)

I have sold myself short for someone....

I am a....HOE!!!!!

but the thing is...what Nicole said was true....

"why u be buggin like im sum kinda HOE???"

But u aint touchin me like im yer HOE!!!

yes ladies n gents....

i am a.....SLUTTY HOE!!

banjir aja gitu

2007-02-02T01:10:00.000+07:00

GILA ya...

21 taun gue tinggal di komplek tercinta lebak lestari indah...

GA PERNAH gue musti kerendem banjir sampe masuk garasi...
yang alhasil kutu ORANJE ku terpaksa terendam... hiks...
sedangkan JePi dan mobil bapak baik baik aja... menyebalkan!

Jalanan... banjir sepinggang... di garasi... se mata kaki aja.....

CAPE BANGET

2007-01-29T15:10:00.000+07:00

How many times do u have to invest on something....or someone....
to actually find the perfect one?

How many disappointments do u have to get before u finally get the right one?

How many heartbreaks must u deal with before you can actually
have someone for your own?

Is it wrong to let your guard down?

COngrats Ms.Hudson!

2007-01-18T00:25:00.000+07:00

the Golden Globes, as always, was fun to watch....

Some of the awards were a bit boring to the stomach...

But the highlight of the night was Ms. Jennifer hudson, one of Chicago's native (thanx for the additional info ya,Beyb....So she lives near you then? hehehehe) and one of American Idol's finalist in season 3, won the award for best supporting actress....

And she gave one of the best and true-to-the-heart acceptance speech!

She has come a long way!

current Occurances

2007-01-14T11:28:00.000+07:00

Current Mood:
**Up n About....

Current Song:
**JoJo--still.... Too Little Too Late

Current Interest:
**Getting to know someone a little better...

Current Longing:
**a less-complicated relationship

Current Hate:
**distance...

Current Excitement:
**talking to someone over the phone last nite...

Current Obssession:
**finishing the damn school....

Current Cravings:
**Mongolian BBQ... thanx to Ms.Tyra Banks and her nasty eating habit...

Current Thoughts:
**that I had so much fun last nite with the girls...and talking to ehm ehm ehm ehm ehm..... hehehehhe

tontonan 2007 ku

2007-01-08T16:59:00.000+07:00

Ahhhhhhhhh...............

cant wait for the summer movies to come....

Di channel V udah keluar trailer-trailer film yang musti gue tonton...

From Marvel Universe:

belom lagi bakal ada Transformers (Autobots and Decepticons...still remember them as if it was yesterday), Shrek 3, Wonder Woman the movie....

asoooooooooy!

Lelah

2007-01-03T01:27:00.000+07:00

Ada kalanya dimana kita berharap akan sesuatu yang lebih dari lingkungan sekitar... sesuatu bentuk balasan yang kita harapkan muncul atas segala pengorbanan yang kita lakukan... segala "EXTRA-MILE" yang kita korbankan untuk lingkungan sekitar....
Namun... ketidaksempurnaan memang milik kita... segala harapan tersebut tidak muncul semudah yang kita bayangkan...
Pada suatu titik hidup, ada kalanya dimana kita merasa LELAH...
Lelah dengan segala keputus asaan... lelah dengan segala kekecewaan yang ada... lelah dengan konflik pribadi yang terjadi dalam benak kita....
Tetapi untuk merasakan kekecewaan dari lingkungan yang kita anggap lingkungan terdekat... membuat kita merasa kurang berharganya diri kita....
Alhamdulillah..... walaupun kekecewaan muncul dari lingkungan yang cukup dekat ku....
LINGKUNGAN TERDEKATKU belum mengecewakan aku....
thanx for being there for the past 2006.... hope that next year will be filled with joy and luck (you know who you are!)
and for the new people... hope the new year will bring us closer!

empty!

2006-12-26T23:08:00.000+07:00

I see desperation....

I see sadness....

I see cruelty....

I see tears....

and all of those appear....just by looking at the mirror......

PR dari Hary yang musti diisi

2006-12-17T15:36:00.000+07:00

7 facts about me:

1.Bitchy
2.introverted
3.extroverted (bingung ga loe?)
4.outspoken
5.sensitive
6.lovable....
7.peaceful...sometimes...

7 cita-cita:

1.tajir walafiat
2.nyenengin keluarga
3.banyak temen
4.punya pacar baik dan ga suka tidur-tidur sama orang (tuh catet!)
5.kerjaan enak
6.pny rumah ndiri...
7.tau deh apa lagi

7 tempat yang mau dikunjungin:

1.London....
2.anywhere...
3.Aberdeen....just to look around...
4.Chicago
5. anywhere...
6.anywhere...
7.anywhere...

7 tempat makan ok:

1.SUshitei
2.KFC yang menyediakan chicken BOOBIES
3.PastaMatrix Pim 2
4. Dixie Citos
5. Burger daddy di apjay...
6. Tratoria Pd.iNdah
7.McDonald yang menyediakan 24 jam service

7 ucapan terima kasih:

1. thanx to ALLAH SWT yang ngasih hidup
2. My mom....yang ngasih semua...
3. Baby, aNnika, Mira, Vero, Varin, Tania, Nadski....the girls who have been there for me for the past year...
4.The Njionjias plus plus (termasuk di dalamnya avin, tante Bom, fadly, herry, angga, erick yang memberi tawa dalam hidup gue....) dan juga teman2 lain seperti Gondut, Dina, Mami Lag, S.G.Schaab dll....
5.Hary yang di kamboja yang secara implisit minta gue isi ini....yang selalu memberi sms checking to see if im ok or not...
6.thanx to my students....
7.thanx to Bang Wis yang bikin template blog nya juga....hehehhehehe

7 orang yang akan bikin PR ini:

1--7....terserah aja..... hehhehehheheh

DAMNNNNNNNNNNNNNED

2006-12-17T15:30:00.000+07:00

Every glitch...there's the silver lining...and that is, if you REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY wanna see it...

This numbness has got to wear off somehow, but it leads to a better me....so they say...

Watching Oprah, i noticed she quoted Teddy Ebersol's book (Susan St.James youngest son who died in a plane crash, and he was only 14)...

"The finish line is just the beginning of a new race..."

UH HUH...
As i try to figure it out...

(which is really obvious what it meant)

I am seeing it in a whole new clear way i guess....that its never about the finish line, but it's always about the beginning....

Skip the confusion part for later, coz i got bigger fish to feed you...

"Life is nothing but a road rage..."

HOOKAAAAAY....
This time, i'm really putting my every drop of sweat thinking about what it meant...
(coming from an english teacher who speaks it constantly shouldnt have been to hard...but knowing how slow i can be digesting everything...so yeah...pret-ty SLOW!)
and last but not least...

Peyton Sawyer...P-Sawyer said on her creative output...

"PEOPLE will LEAVE!"

Now this I understood perfectly, considering everything i've been thru....
NOW...

Put them in use....

membekas

2006-11-30T15:59:00.000+07:00

Jika memang moment itu telah lewat,
Mengapa sakit hati itu masih ada?
Jika memang dia bukan tercipta untukku,
Mengapa sakit hati itu masih ada?
Jika aku telah merelakannya,
Mengapa sakit hati itu masih ada?
Jika aku telah berhenti mencintainya,
Mengapa sakit hati itu TETAP ada?
Jika dia hanyalah sepenggal masa lalu yang tak berharga,
Mengapa sakit hati itu MEMBEKAS?
Jika memang aku telah berhenti mencintainya,
Apakah tangisku mengatakan sebaliknya?
Jika aku memang berusaha untuk berjalan ke depan,
Mengapa aku hanya bisa berjalan sambil menoleh ke belakang?

hirup napas dan lepas

2006-11-22T23:44:00.000+07:00

Jika mereka bilang kesendirian itu menyakitkan, mungkin mereka benar...
Jika mereka bilang kesendirian itu membunuh, mungkin mereka benar...
Jika mereka bilang kesendirian itu menyenangkan, mungkin mereka benar...

TETAPI...

Setidaknya kesendirian membuatku berpikir...
Apa arti diriku, jika memang untuk sendiri...

Setidaknya kesendirian membuatku terjaga...
Terjaga dari rasa sakit hati yang akan tiba...

Setidaknya kesendirian membuatku menangis...
Tangisan tertunda yang kupendam selama ini...

Setidaknya kesendirian membuatku berdiri...
Berdiri sendiri tanpa harus menjawab pada siapapun...

FIUHHHHHH

2006-11-20T00:53:00.000+07:00

With only 2 sleeping hours...

(3.30am--5.30am)

and with half pitcher of cocktails in my blood...

It's really sursprising I survived the HOT day wearing the traditional wear for the reception committee on my boss' wedding...

and not to mention, the PIZZA date with Aci and Nikka...

what a tiring day!

peringatan dari Tuhan

2006-11-12T19:40:00.000+07:00

siang-siang bolong di radio dalam...
sebuah chevrolet Zafira 8971 KZ berwarna biru metalik meluncur, dengan dua penumpang di dalamnya...
secara tiba-tiba tertimpa BATANG POHON tepat pada kaca depan yang membuat kedua penumpangnya tersentak kaget...
Si pengemudi yang takjub dengan pengalaman yang sebelumnya tidak pernah disangka akan terjadi padanya, langsung luluh dengan muka pucat pasi...Si teman botaknya berusaha menenangkan si pengemudi, walaupun sebetulnya jika kaca mobil tersebut tidak diberi proteksi,kemungkinan si penumpang botak itu terkena pecahan kaca yang dapat mengakibatkan dirinya terluka parah pun cukup besar.
Si pengemudi lalu mulai berpikir tentang apa yang terjadi, sepertinya ia mendapatkan peringatan dari Tuhan atas semua yang terjadi padanya akhir-akhir ini...
it's true what they say:
"Your whole life flashes entirely before your eyes when u have the near death experience."
and yes...this accident will be in the "near death experience" category.

Nicole Scherzinger

2006-11-11T13:32:00.000+07:00

There is something about her voice that captures me...

and her radiant beauty.... really embraces her diverse background....

her exotic look.... just dashes through everyone's eye....

Ms.Nicole Scherzinger..... she is AWWWWWWWWWWEEEEE-SOOOOOMEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

my so-called normal Thursday

2006-11-10T02:03:00.000+07:00

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh.......

it's been a long time sejak kita party bareng.....

and awal minggu, ada undangan dari Cici for cK's fall fashion show... sekaligus launchingnya di dragonFly......
it was fun, but i think we're getting older... jadi udah biasa aja....

it was FUN... being with them....

After that..... gue, GonDo, HeYi, Chorie and Adi decided to get something to eat...

After party di menteng.....
ahhhhhhhh miss the good old days....

Oh... before the party, I had dinner with Nikka for our weekly booby nite... as always..... and she gave me a present.... I LOVE IT!!!!!!!! thanx Niks........

NUMBERS

2006-11-08T00:48:00.000+07:00

It's so ironic.....

I hate Maths...

and yet... I'm completely HOOKED on NUMBERS on AXN....

so completely hooked on the Eppes Brothers, Agent Megan Reeves, Colby Granger.....

on the line

2006-11-03T08:45:00.000+07:00

I'm laying it
On the line to show youI'll never let you go
On the line for your love
There's nothing
I want more

Another dead end street
Another love gone wrong
Another shattered dream Always the same old song
I started thinking that
You'd never come along
I got all this love inside
That I'm sure you want tonight
I'm wishing you
What I've been through
To get to you

I'm laying it
On the line to show youI'll never let you go
On the line for your love
There's nothing I want more
When you smile I feel my heart open And I know there's nothing
That I wouldn't doI'm layin' it
On the line this time
Just to be with you

After everything My heart's been through
I treasure, every momentI spend with you
For me to feel this wayIs something new
Now it's got a hold of me
It's making me believe That what We got is something Unlike any other

Oh, oh Yeah, yeah
If you're thinking,What you're thinking
Girl, all you gotta doIs say the word
If you tell me
What you need
I can get you
What you're asking for
When I didn't have a prayer
I thought nobody cared
I turned around and
You were there

How I've been(Oh)Waiting for you(Waiting for you baby)

And I want you to know(And I want you to know)

having no one

2006-10-29T16:20:00.000+07:00

I see 2 men eating beside me...

I see one family talking and chatting wtih each other...

I see one caucasian man staring outside the cafe...

I see waiters and waitresses wandering around...

I see a few empty tables waiting for the guests to sit...

I see people outside with their love ones, just hanging out...

AND as for myself...

I am sitting in the corner, going online...waiting for someone to talk to me....

Loneliness kills....being alone kills...having no one to talk to kills....

having no one to share what u feel kills....

having no one to ask u how u are kills....

HAVING NO ONE....KILLS!!!

HIKS

2006-10-21T23:35:00.000+07:00

Truth bites you in the ass...

yeap for real!

As i was having a friendly dinner with 3 of my friends di semanggi, gue bertem dengan salah satu object of my infatuation.....

and turned out, dia bersama "seseorang"....

dengan miris, gue congratulated dia...at least dia bisa happy with orang yang dia pilih....

Anyway, Avin & BoNa.....thanx for the lovely dinner....it was a blast!

Clay Aiken

2006-10-19T14:08:00.000+07:00

His voice is angelic.....

I am swooned by 2 tracks on this damn CD!

SICK n TIRED

2006-10-18T13:29:00.000+07:00

I'm tired of playing games....

I'm tired of expecting something....

I'm so fed up with the complexities....

I'm MORTIFIED by the idea of spending my days all alone...

I'm sick of myself....

I'm sick of being so vulnerable to the slightest temptation comes upon me...

I'm sick of crying all by myself....not knowing what to do....what to say....

POLIGAMI/SELINGKUH

2006-10-03T00:05:00.000+07:00

Browsing channel TV di malem hari, gue tiba-tiba tertegun menonton OM FARHAN di Anteve, dengan bintang tamu FARHAT ABBAS, salah satu manusia tengik di bumi Jakarta yang menurut gue tujuan hidupnya hanya untuk mengelabuhi wanita-wanita berumur...

TOPIK malam itu adalah POLIGAMI, dengan bintang tamu lainnya yaitu pak Puspo yang istrinya banyak... dan makin kesini makin muda...

*perempuan... kasian bener masalahnya, rebutan ama laki-laki poligami sama laki-laki yang nyari laki-laki juga*

Farhat berusaha jelasin apa yang dialami... dengan beberapa kejadian kawin siri-nya...

*salah satunya adalah tetangga gue... temennya nyokap pula*

Alasan yang digunakan cukup absurd, dan menyudutkan wanita... seakan-akan para wanita lah yang menggoda iman pria, sehingga pria berpoligami. Secara implisit gue menangkap adanya sikap arogan farhat, bahwa seakan akan dia LAKI PALING CAKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP sedunia...

*hidung ama ama pantat bentuknya sama-sama gede gitu*

Lalu, bintang tamu dari pihak wanita muncul, Trie Utami yang baru bercerai karena merelakan suaminya untuk menikah kembali dengan seorang wanita yang lebih muda...

Farhan pun tanya, apakah Trie Utami menolak Poligami?

Dan Mbak I'Ie menjawab dengan cukup membuat gue kagum:

"Saya tidak menolak poligami, atau membenci poligami. Ada perbedaan substansial antara MENOLAK poligami dan TIDAK SANGGUP. Saya merasa saya tidak sanggup, jadi saya merelakan suami saya."

Untuk mengakui ketidak sanggupan akan poligami menurut gue butuh keberanian yang cukup tinggi, karena tidak semua wanita bisa merelakan suaminya gitu aja. Mereka kebanyakan lebih menerima keadaan bahwa suaminya menikahi wanita lain, dengan apapun alasannya...

Farhan bertanya lagi, Apa motivasi suami Trie Utami untuk menikah kembali/berpoligami?

Trie Utami menjawab dengan satu pernyataan yang bikin gue bener-bener tersentak kagum:

"Sebetulnya motivasi itu hanya diketahui oleh orangnya (si pelaksana) dan Tuhan, karena mungkin adanya keterbatasan linguistik yang ada, sehingga ada kemungkinan apa yang kita ucapkan bukan manifestasi dari apa yang kita rasakan. Tetapi ya seperti kita tahu bahwa poligami untuk agama Islam memang diijinkan, bahkan ada hukum-hukum dan ayatnya yang membolehkan. Tapi ya kembali ke motivasi, kadang kita musti ingat bahwa SYAHWAT dan AYAT itu beda-beda tipis..."

Kekaguman gue mulai menganalisa kalimat yang dilontarkan Trie Utami.

*Bener Juga*

Seperti yang kita ketahui, Nabi Muhammad SAW pun berpoligami, dan tentu alasannya sangat tulus dan gue pun percaya, karena dia Nabi kita juga kan ya?

Sekarang masalah nya, apa bener laki-laki yang berpoligami dengan dalih yang sama itu TULUS? Does that work in this ERA?

Untuk ERA sekarang, menurut gue POLIGAMI is like CHEATING... but UNFORTUNATELY, it's allowed... THE Holy Qur'an and the LAW allow it...

Pria yang SELINGKUH selalu mencari sesuatu yang tidak ada pada partner sebelumnya. Mereka berusaha mengisi kehampaan yang tidak diisi oleh partner mereka. PELAKU PERSELINGKUHAN artinya mulai untuk tidak menghormati pasangan mereka... keegoisan mereka untuk berusaha mengisi kekurangan-kekurangan yang ada...
*sini kan ahli bener diselingkuhin hihihihihhi*

Buat perempuan...
Yang pinter-pinter yeeee nyari laki... susah deh pokoknya...

Birthday Wish

2006-09-27T13:48:00.000+07:00

Terhitung dari jam 13.45 siang ini, thanx to: (in time order)

Baby (first testimonial yesterday)
A'a Laguna, Tommy, GonDo, Lucky, Chorie, Ferdi, Adhit (for the so-called bday candle-blowing ceremony)
PUngkY (first caller) and Erick (first SMS)
CuCung, Dody Sby, Andy, Varin, Rullyanti Andeslina, Mas Rama, Aya (twin), Nizar, Yuke, Bang Wis, Lissa, Eva, Cindy, RisTi, Angga Rahman, Mbak Fei, KoKo Kardi, Sacha Schaab, Cici-Qoe, CeuCeu-Qoe, Chike, Ake, Renny, ROmmy, Acrut, Mamie, Rudy, WinnY, Budi, Jella, Vero, Fadly Ramdhani, Avin Kesuma, Tessa, Enti, TOma, Henny, Eqi, Jessica Surya, Puspa, Wina, Mira, Mbak Widya, Alfi, Tante Bom2...

ANd counting....

THanx for all the wish guys...

TOUGH

2006-09-20T18:39:00.000+07:00

Can't believe that puasa is about to start... somehow i realized that time does fly when u're having fun, playing sad, or doing hoo-key...

and My birthday's comin' up next week... the big 26, 4 years before the big 3-O...

What have i accomplished? Two lousy breakups with TWO really disturbed mind-freeks...

Haven't finished what i was suppose to finish ages ago... (AKA: SEMESTERS AGO)

Still unable to control moodswings which regulary goes south depending on circumstances...

TOUGH!!!

too little too late

2006-09-08T14:38:00.000+07:00

Ooh no
Come with me, stay the night
You say the words but boy it don't feel right
What do you expect me to say (You know it's just too little too late)
You take my hand, and you say you've changed
But boy you know your beggin don't fool me
Because to you it's just a game
So let me on down
Cause time has made me strong
I'm starting to move on
I'm gonna say this now
Your chance has come and gone
And you know
It's just too little too late
A little too wrong
And I can't wait
Boy you know all the right things to say (You know it's just too little too late)
You say you dream of my face
But you don't like me
You just like the chase
To be real, it doesn't matter anyway (You know it's just too little too late)
I was young and in love
I gave you everything but it wasn't enough
And now you wanna communicate
Go find someone else
In lettin you go, I'm lovin myself
You gotta problem
But don't come askin me for help
Cause ya know
It's just too little too late
A little too wrong
And I can't wait
Boy you know all the right things to say (You know it's just too little too late)
You say you dream of my face
But you don't like me
You just like the chase
To be real, it doesn't matter anyway (You know it's just too little too late)
I can love with all of my heart baby
I know I have so much to give (I have so much to give)
With a player like you, I don't have a prayer
That's the way to live, yeah oh
It's just too little, too late
Yeah
It's just too little too late
A little too wrong
And I can't wait
Boy you know all the right things to say (You know it's just too little too late)
You say you dream of my face
But you don't like me
You just like the chase
To be real, it doesn't matter anyway (You know it's just too little too late)

doink doink doink

2006-09-01T15:18:00.000+07:00

Diolah dari sisi gue, sisi sahabat-sahabat gue, sampe ke sisi psikologis...

Gue belom dapet setidaknya konklusi dari semua dilema yang gue alami...

Gue belom bisa mengambil keputusan yang mantap...

YeSsss...hal ini bener-bener bikin sifat LIBRA gue mencuat dengan sendirinya...tidak bisa menentukkan sikap, terlalu menimang-nimang hal-hal yang sebetulnya nyata...banyak pertimbangan both internally and externally...

KARMA...one word yang spinning in my head during this cycle...

i dont wanna be the person who i usually hate...

A'a even told me that I should never "pull the FERDI" (maap ya Ferdi...hehehehehehe),jadi sekarang gue ga tau...

HAni asked me, kesabaran gue bisa sampe mana?
dan jujur...jawaban itu pun gak gue miliki....

smirking

2006-08-16T00:54:00.000+07:00

When u're down.....

u cant help yourself but to let loose....

I myself.....love to dance....surrounded by people...especially your own innercircle....dance around....have a few drinks....

Few tips:

1. Prepare the guestlist....fun way to club.....would be the free entry ones *LOL*

2. Gather around troops that are socially active....fun...energetic....looney......

3. Money, Credit card....not too much though....excessive drinking would lead to reckless driving.....and I DONT drive DRUNK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

dilematis

2006-08-08T17:35:00.000+07:00

Agak membingungkan dengan cara kerja dunia...

kalo kata Kemal:

"You can't have everything u want!"

dan dari kata-kata itu langsung mulai berhujanan kalimat-kalimat kiasan yang bermakna sama:

"nobody's perfect!"

"semua orang punya kekurangan dan kelebihan!"

"kekurangan dan kelebihan itu manusiawi!"

bla bla bla bla.......

Dihadapkan dengan seseorang yang cukup baik,kalo Sacha bilang ngasih rating itu ga penting....tapi just to give a glimpse aja....a seven (7)!
Ngobrol cukup nyambung, umur ga beda-beda amat, pekerjaan lumayan dengan watak kedewasaan yang cukup...

TAPI....(everything we see and do has its BUTs)

orang ini adalah orang yang pilihan hidupnya gue benci dari dulu...bisa dibilang karma kali ya....gue dapet orang yang totally the opposite aja...
Yang membuat gue cukup down adalah dia ngga mau ketemu dengan temen-temen gue....atau at least innercircles gue yang cukup berarti dalam hidup gue...dalam artian dia PARNO'!!!!!!!
Gue tidak pernah memaksa dia untuk bertemu dengan innercircles gue kalo dia belom siap....dan gue juga ga yakin dia siapnya kapan...
Dia juga melontarkan kalimat-kalimat dan opini-opini yang menurut gue ngga penting untuk dikeluarkan...

gue dihadapkan dengan orang yang cukup sensitif....terkadang judes....hingga gue belajar untuk TONE-DOWN (something that i rarely do) karena ga mungkin dengan watak dia yang keras,gue bales dengan kerasnya watak gue....

Kalo orang tanya:

"LOE UDAH JADIAN YA?"

hmmppppfff......maybe we are.....maybe we're not....karena to tell you the truth....i dont know....

I want to....but melihat keadaan kaya gini, apa harus gue terusin? Dia orang yang baik....opinionated....i learn a lot lah.......

If i stopped this, apa gue yang bangsat karena tidak memberi dia kesempatan?

SO....to answer the question, gue akan bilang bahwa:

"I'm dating someone...maybe i am in a relationship....or it's complicated....but i'm just rolling the snowball aja...."

sorry.........

2006-08-01T01:10:00.000+07:00

I'm sorry for everything...

i'm sorry for the trouble i have caused you guys...

i'm sorry for all the disappointments and discourages...

I'm sorry for chasing away people who mean a lot in life...

i'm sorry for the mindless conduct shown which effected each and everyone of the people who i care the most deeply...

i'm sorry for the intentional and unintentional behaviour of mine which were disappointments to each and every one of you...

-sebel-

2006-07-25T15:05:00.000+07:00

ErrrRRrrRRrggggggggghHHHH

ada orang yang menyia-nyiakan sebuah hubungan yang solid dengan orang yang mencintai sepenuh hati....

BENCIIIII GUE!!!!!

and di sisi lain, ada orang-orang yang susah untuk dapetin suatu hubungan yang imbang dan meaningful....

bahkan ada orang-orang yang couldn't even find a casual date....

emotional dependency

2006-07-15T02:27:00.000+07:00

What is an emotional dependency?

Does everyone have an emotional depedency...let alone 2 or 3 emotional dependencies?

Kalo kata Chorie, an emotional dependency is someone that you count on everytime you're down low...or up high...either way, Emotional dependencies provide a real comfort to your own soul, an emotional pain-reliever....

Question is, Does everyone have such a thing called emotional dependency? and how do we realize that someone is our emotional dependency?

A few layers in friendship that we need to know:

Acquaintance, someone you know...(barely)...no emotional bonding what so ever...

Friend, someone you know, you hang out with...with parts of emotional bonding,not exactly people you can relate to...

Close-friend, people you spend most of your time, there is the bonding, the sharing of experience, and you can actually relate to...

BestFriend, people that you are really really really close to, you have a tight emotional bonding, not necessarily spending most of your time together, but you have an open communication...someone who knows you more than anyone else as well as you know them...you have a mutual feedback...

Emotional dependency, deeper than the 4 layers mentioned above...

So....Exactly...what do I have?

pretty much the whole fiesco...and I'm enjoying every bit of those layers...

what's left of me

2006-07-14T14:15:00.000+07:00

Watch my life,
Pass me by,
In the rearview mirror
Pictures frozen in time
Are becoming clearer
I don't wanna waste another day
Stuck in the shadow of my mistakes
Yeah...

[Chorus]
Cause I want you,
And I feel you,
Driving underneath my skin
Like a hunger,
Like a burning,
To find a place ive never been
Now I'm broken,
And I'm faded,
I'm half the man i thought i would be:
But you can have what's left of me

I've been dying inside,
Little by little,
No where to go,
But going out of my mind
In endless circles,
Running from my self until,
You give me a reason for standing still

[Chorus]

It's falling faster,
Barely breathing,
Give me something,
To believe in
Tell me: It's all in my head
Take what's left
Of this man
Make me whole
Once again

[Chorus]

I've been dying inside you see
Im going out of my mind
Out of my mind
I'm just running in circles all the time
Will you take what's left
Will you take what's left
Will you take what's left of me?
Running in circles all the time
Will you take what's left
Will you take what's left
Will you take what's left of me?

dugem moeloe....

2006-07-09T19:41:00.000+07:00

Emang deh...

Janji kalo minggu ini ga mau dugem,pasti dilanggar....

Lagi di tempat A'a Laguna, nelfon Avin yang lagi dan gosipan sama Irzam....tiba-tiba Irzam nyeletuk...

"BOOOOO, Dugem yuuuuuuukkkkkkkkk!!!!"

pas disaat call waiting gue masuk dengan nama "NDUT"...

*heh tumben siang2 nelfon*

Lalu...

"Bo, si Ferdi jadi host aja gitu....dia lagi pengen dugem...jadi kita punya 10 nih...ayo urus...ajak yang lain!" kata Ndut.

*SHIT*

list nya yaitu Tante Bom2, Angkhela, Kenny, Me, Ndut, Ferdi, Arif, Farid, Chorie....

*katanya*

turns out...Farid dan Arif bailed out...dan CeuCeu jadi ikutan...bersama Zamri....

Malem Dinner sama Cucung...dan ternyata dia jadi host juga....so...

we got 20 guestlist....NGERI...giliran nyari suka susah, giliran males dapet banyak banget....

Kenny akhirnya membawa satu temannya bernama Shinta.....yang ternyata udah MABOK BERAT....and sumpah gengges KOCAK....

SHe went on the platform and danced her way there....almost took off her clothes....

*GOD*

but it was a fun and crazy nite....

ME

2006-07-06T15:33:00.000+07:00

tobytha@yahoo.com

for yahoo email....friendster...and also yahoo messenger.....

hehehheheheheh

lets talk online!!!!

quote of the week

2006-07-06T13:36:00.000+07:00

Quote of the week...

As I watched the third episode of Kevin Hill...

One of the lawyer made a closing argument...and it just hit home:

"You choose your own destiny! Sometimes it's easier to blame your failure on something or someone....the fact is...it's not their responsibility....It's all about accepting the consequences in life...."

it is easier to blame it on someone/something....but it's HARDER to accept the consequences instead of throwing them back at others....

wheel of life

2006-07-04T23:55:00.000+07:00

Out of sanity, comes stupidity...
And with the moment of stupidity, I finally collapse...

I suddenly realize that i'm in a sinking hole with no one to hold...no one to pull me up...

Everything is like a wheel....it turns and turns....never know when to be at the top nor the bottom of the sinking hole...

People say that the heart is just like a wheel, when you break it...you just can't mend it....and even if you could, sometimes it's just not that easy...

Right now...

I dont even know whether I should continue....to pursuit something that isn't rightfully mine....
Or maybe happiness was never meant for me...

Right now...

Everyone is way ahead of me....to a point where the top of the sinking hole vanishes in the horizon....

Right now...

I can only stand up for myself...pacing through the steps where it was left off....
Dealing with my fear....mending bit by bit the wheel that was broken into a shapeless form....

Tim KijMer FiSip UI '99

2006-07-01T11:58:00.000+07:00

How I really miss those days with them...

Ga ada yang nandingin....

SExy Love

2006-07-01T11:52:00.000+07:00

My sexy Love...

She makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up
Just one touch, and I errupt
Like a volcano and cover her with my love
Baby girl you make me say ooooh

And i just can't think(of any thing else I'd rather do)
Then to hear you sing (sing my name the way you do)
Oh when we do our thang (when we do the things we do)
Mmm Baby girl you make me say oooh

CHORUS
Sexy love, girl the things you do Keep me sprung,
Keep me runnin back to you
Ooh I love makin love to youBaby girl you know your my

Sexy Love

Im so addicted to how shes the sweetest drug
Just enough,still too much
Say that im semp and im sprung on the bee above
I cant help she makes me say oohh

And i just cant think (of anything else I'd rather do)
Then to hear you sing (sing my name the way you do)
Baby when we do our thang(when we do the things we do)
Oh baby girl you make me say oooh

My sexy love...

CHORUS

Oh Baby when we do it makes the sun come up
And keep on lovin till it goes back down
And i dont know what I'd do if would lose your touch
That's why I'm always keepin you aroundMy sexy loovvee

CHORUS 2X

She makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up
Just one touch...

Kinan Geri Bosha

2006-06-28T00:25:00.000+07:00

Everyone knows that sometimes i hate toddlers....

Eventhough sometimes i teach them...but hey....we all have our fake-corporate smile....

But not this kid....

meet my nephew....2 years old..

Kinan Geri Bosha....

He is annoyingly adorable....hihihihihihi

WEEKEND-an

2006-06-25T12:46:00.000+07:00

Kemaren...

Brunch with the girls from IMC....catching up stories....so many of them.....gossipin' and stuff like that....

I miss Aci and Risti....

Later that nite, Lebak Bulus macet banget....It took me nearl an hour just to get out dari kompleks.....

SHOOT!

SAmpe rumah Adhit, it was too late untuk ketemu Cici karena dia mau nonton jam 20.30....

And we had to be at RETRO (for Paul's Thingy lah....Annika got the invitations,so what da heck...R&B nite sounded so tempting at that time)

Akhirnya jemput Nikka at Pim....Jemput CeuCeu di kostnya, and melipir ke Pisa sebentar karena diajakin T'Tini charity nite....

well...its not like we had a really grand plan anyways...

Got there...ate dinner....(sambil nyumbang...alhamdulillah....senangnya makan bisa nyumbang)

And Mira came.....lalu kita berangkat lah ke RETRO....

and we got there....

*DAMN*

Filled with ABEGE.....perintilan ga penting dengan gaya sok BLING-BLING...dari yang pake kemben, celana loose fit and chains everywhere....sampe yang ga pake BH nunjukkin cleavage yang HUGE!!!!!

*eWWWWWW*

We were totally misplaced....we danced a bit for 45 minutes...but thats it....nothing fancy.....

And somehow, Ceuceu, Adhit and I jadi mikir...

*kok somehow the idea clubbing di (sebuah klub yang selalu kita kunjungi) sounded more exciting?*

We were like SUPERMEN with NO POWERS.....

YAIIIIIKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

glimpse...

2006-06-23T11:58:00.000+07:00

If you're ever on the road...

Feeling lonely and so cold...

all u have to do is call my name and i'll be there on the next train...

Where you lead...i will follow...anywhere that u tell me to...

narsis

2006-06-18T14:39:00.000+07:00

Narsis kah?

ga juga...walopun ini bisa terjadi kapan aja dan dimana aja?

So happens kejadian foto ini terjadi di dalam ViTor (vios....)nya Baby, one of my dearest bestfriend on our lunch date di sushitei PiM....

Senangnya ga nyetir....is that loe bisa gratakin barang-barang orang lain...terutama Henfon...dan foto-foto lah...

alhasil...she sent me the photos...and i decided to get a bit narcistic...hihihihihihihhi

me,myself,and toby

2006-06-16T11:46:00.000+07:00

I dance....

I walk....

I run....

I curse....

I laugh....

I Talk.....

I drive....

I play....

only for myself.....just myself.....

family pictures

2006-06-14T23:07:00.000+07:00

Dont we just look like a "NORMAL" dysfunctional family????

*what's so normal about being dysfunctional?*

charmed Ones....

2006-06-14T12:47:00.000+07:00

Prue, Piper, Phoebe were 3 ordinary women who caught up with the prophecy of the Power of three of the Charmed ones, the most powerful witches of all time.

Their mother, Patty Halliwell, inherited them with three powers, telekinetic powers, freezing powers, and premonition.

As years went by, the three sisters' powers grew with amazing transformation.

Prue, with her ability to astral project herself anytime she wanted.

Piper, can manipulate molecules in which causes the objects aimed blow up.

Phoebe, can levitate and projects emotions through her tele-emphatic power.

But, with great powers comes great responsibilities with great sacrifice. The sisters had to lose one of her own in order to save the remaining charmed ones.

Paige Matthews was chosen to continue the legacy of the charmed ones, replacing Prue's place.
Paige was one of Patty's illegitimate daughter with her whitelighter, Sam.

With Piper, Phoebe and Paige, the prophecy continues.

And their world evolves...

Piper is married to their whitelighter (apple doesn't fall far from the tree, i assume), Leo Wyatt and are blessed with birth of 2 babies...Wyatt Matthews Halliwell and Chris Halliwell (who came back from the future to help the charmed ones correct the mistakes that would result a devastating future.)

Phoebe was married to a demon (Cole Turner AKA Balthazar), and had to vanquish him to protect the world. In the end, the Elders decided to give Phoebe a second chance on finding true love and sent Coop (A cupid, one of the angel of love) as her future love interest.

Paige Matthews ended up marrying a mortal, Henry, a parole officer, and still holds on to the bargain by being a whitelighter. Billie was one of her charges, is now one of the families' confedant.

Yesterday was the last episode of the series...and just cant believe it has been 8 years already....

BAKPAO

2006-06-12T09:57:00.000+07:00

Konferensi Latina Lovers hari Minggu, diawali dengan kegiatan gue menginterview anak-anak AFS pagi-pagi buta...

*jam 7 pagi menurut gue cukup fajar kok*

Chorie minta gue dan Adhit untuk bantuin interview bahasa Inggris di SMP 11, pada hari Minggu (kuturut ayah ke kota...bla bla bla)Dengan rasa kantuk yang mendalam,ditambah ketidak relaan bangun pagi jam 6.30...

*secara sini baru tidur jam 2 juga kan ya?*

Menurut Chorie, ada laporan bahwa gue agak kebawa judes...padahal sini biasa aja juga kan...ga judes-judes amat!

ANyway, telfon-telfonan sama Cici dan Angkhela dan janjian jemput mereka di plaza semanggi...

*untungnya si kutu oranJe-ku sudah diberi subsidi premium yang cukup*

Jemput mereka,dan mereka berniat untuk ganti baju dan off we go to Plaza Senayan tercinta untuk rendezvous bersama CeuCeu, Pinkan, Tape, Violetta dan Chorie!Setelah pada ngumpul (minus Choraima dan Violetta yang langsung nyusul ke Arcadia), kita memutuskan untuk ngupi di Gelato Arcadia.

Gelak tawa riang canda bersama orang-orang gila...
dari foto-foto...

*dengan digicam Pungky yang membuat diriku terlihat dashyat*

sampe gosipin orang...

*banyak ya orang-orang nyebelin dan ga penting di sekitar hidup kami...what a wonder*

yang dilanjutkan dengan bermain ABC Pancasila...

*dibaca ey-bi-si kalo kata Ake...miss you bitch!*

kemudian pembahasan selanjutnya...yang diteruskan di Lokananta...

"Apa beli bkp?" tanya gue.
"Mberrrrr...kan pada pesen sama Pungky!" kata Angkhela.
"Oh gitu...yaolo ngerinya....kalian pada pesen beli BOKAP!" kata gue sambil ketawa.
"Ih sape yang beli bokap-bokap?" kata CeuCeu.
"Beli DADDY-DADDY bo....huahuahauhuahauhauhauhauhau." kata gue.

*kok ngeri ya?*

"Mending kita ganti aja...Beli BakPao!" kata Cici.
"Oh beli bakpao...iya iya iya....lucu tuh!" Kata pinkan.
"Jadi loe mau yang mana? Ada Bakpao Jepang, Bakpao Italy, Bakpao Latin, Bakpao Amerika dan bakpao setengah mateng." kata Violetta.

*tertawa puas kita semua*

"ato bakpao beruang?" tambah gue.
"dan bakpao BUSUK!" tambah Cici.

*huahuahuahuahuahuahauhauhuahaua*

Definisi juara bulan ini adalah....
BAKPAO...yang mau....pesen sama Pinkan...ntar di copy aja yuk...bagi-bagi ke kita ber9....huahuahuahuahuahuhuahuahuahuahuah

good/bad people

2006-06-10T00:45:00.000+07:00

Have you ever felt that sometimes the world seems so unfair?

Have you ever felt that sometimes people take you for granted?

have you ever felt that sometimes all you do is supporting your peers and yet they often ignore the fact that you DO have feelings...you DO have your own problems to take care of...you DO need them to listen to you back instead of those people being the centre of attention?

Have you ever felt stabbed in the back by your own bestfriend?

Have you ever felt so humiliated by the people that you care about?

WELL...

Lets just say...I have learnt the hard way...
I wont name names...Its not necessary for public to know who they are...

But yeah...judging from this past experience, I learn that sometimes, you need to set boundaries for certain people who think that all you do is listen to them whine and whine about their personal problems without ever consider that...

"hey....what about you? are you ok?"

or maybe just to say...

"If you need anything just call...i'm an sms away!" <-- kalimat ini gue kutip dari sms yang langsung gue terima setaun yang lalu pada saat gue terpuruk, dari seseorang yang paling ignorant sedunia...tapi dia teteubbbbb masih bisa sms ini...thanx, darl...

There are only a few of those people left...and i DO wanna be those people...

I DONT wanna be the end where people actually talking behind my back saying that I DIDNT care about people's feelings....

happy faces

2006-06-05T10:14:00.000+07:00

Tontonan terakhir gue di minggu ini:

Waiting to Exhale....

the story about 4 different black women, who got clobbered over and over again by their love ones.....BUT NEVER from each other....

See this picture with happy faces? a glimpse of my innercircle...

For the past week, i've been feeling a bit....drained...about what i need to do next...how my life can be so screwed....

kalo kata Chorie:

"hidup kalo ga ada gebetan kayanya hambaaaaaRrrrr banget!"

but....then again,gebetan pun ga punya...kerjaan lagi ribet....dan satu hal...TKA ga selse-selse...

*minta maaf kepada semua sahabatku yang akan kecewa....*

tapi akan gue selsekan sekarang,krn seperti yang dibacain Mama-Laguna dalam kartu tarot handalnya:

"you need to finish it!!!!!"

Jumat, had dinner sama Doddy cause gue lagi ngga ada kerjaan juga,dan gue musti tuker mobil sama kakak gue buat servis mobil....so went to PS! Bergosip ceria temanya....

*dan membicarakan foto aibnya di A'a Laguna*

SAbtu, had lunch with my boss...at PS, trus ke darmawangsa square for another lunch appointment sama kakak-kakak gue dan tante gue....

Malem, udah kaya ngga ada kerjaan....di PIM makan sama Mira Kurnia,Adhit,A'a Laguna,and DOddy,disambung coffee time di ohlala thamrin

*bo jauh banget ga menurut loe!*

disusul oleh Cici-ku dan Angkhela....

Minggu, udah ada ajakan pagi-pagi untuk ke asambador sama cici,jadi jemput adhit, ke asambador,jemput cici-ku dan angkhela...dan first stop...LANGSAT CORNER!

next stop, POSITIF...berbelanja critanya...huaaaaaaaaa

*maxed out my card*

dan PIM, untuk menemani Cici yang udah lama ga ke pim, but next thing u know....adhit dan cici berbelanja....huahuahuahuahuahuahauhauhauhau....

Balik ke asambador bersama ceuceu,cici,dan angkhela...had dinner....

And for some reason...I felt relieved....

di soundtrack waiting to exhale ada yang gini:

"i know sometimes it seems as if,we're standing all alone....but we'll get through it...coz love wont let us fall!"

and then...

"count on me through thick and thin, a friendship that will never end...when you got friends,you will be strong...helping you to carry on....count on me i will be there,dont be afraid....please believe me when i say......you can count on me!"

langsung titik airmata berlinang...

*huahuahuahuauaau drama queen....maapkan cici!*

great lesson

2006-05-31T12:11:00.000+07:00

My menu for this week, started last Sunday:
1. X-Men 1
2. The Family Stone
3. The Perfect Man
4. First Daughter
5. The Dukes of Hazzard
6. Must Love Dogs
7. Win a Date with Tad Hamilton

You guys see the pattern?

Yeap...As I recognize the symptoms...Those movies are symptoms of my mood-swing goin' south...

Yes, ladies and gentlemen...I am in a PMS mode (which kinda odd,considering I have no specific tools like women have for this particular occassion)

When Toby's in his weird mode, everything has its effect.
1. Leaving my final assignment high and dry...suddenly I'm not in the mood for it...and yet I disappointed everyone...and for once in my life...
"I DONT CARE!"

2. I spent my last dime for snacks, renting movies, gas for my car to drive around (as part of my mood-lifter).

Watching some of the movies made me think through some of things that happened in my own life. Yes, as stupid as it may seem, still in denial...
Every part of the movies I've watched so far seemed to have somewhat "light-bulb" moments.

*ding*

1. the one you think is the right person, is actually the wrong one...and yes, you are always too late to notice that,when eveyone is way ahead of you noticing it.

*ding ding*

2. it's not wrong to feel insecure about yourself when all you got is failure.

*ding ding ding*

3. hiding yourself behind the curtain and not letting anyone in won't get you anywhere.

*ding ding ding ding*

4. Can I actually make a first move? Making the first move doesn't lead to failure....MUCH....

*ding ding ding ding ding*

5. It's never certain who you'll end up with...but apparently people love the thrill of it....
FIUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

aku....si titisan karen walker bermulut judes

2006-05-28T23:36:00.000+07:00

Ada kalimat klise yang selalu gue denger dari dulu...

"loe ga perlu pacar...ga perlu hal-hal ga penting...karena temen-temen loe pasti ada untuk loe!"

As cliche as that sounds....

It is true...

Me? I'm a true-friendship believer...and sometimes misjudge by people to be rather clingy....
and sometimes, gue juga menganggap diri gue pun seperti itu...

Semenjak kejadian terakhir tentang salah satu sahabat gue, dan gue tau bahwa she stabbed me in the back, it's a bit hard for me to trust new people...so i'm holding on to the people yang udah ada aja sekarang...

Personally, i believe in karma...dari pada sini kena jatah dari apa yang gue lakukan,jadi gue sekarang berusaha untuk dapet good-karma....

Hal yang paling susah dari memperbaiki diri adalah mungkin "MULUT"!

Sharped-tongue...poisonous kalo kata aVin...

Gue paling gak suka sesuatu yang ga according to plan....begitu aneh, mulut berbicara....

I hurt people by the way i talk....Everyone knows that....it's probably one of those core reason kalo gue punya banyak musuh...

*walopun tidak sebanding dengan jumlah teman yang kumiliki huahauhuahauhua*

Ge-eR dikit lah...

Menjaga diri....berusaha berbuat baik...itu lah inti hidup! kayanya...hehehhehhehehe

X Men

2006-05-25T23:49:00.000+07:00

Sebagai X-Men Buff, gue bener-bener nungguin banget film X-Men 3: the Last Stand...

Thanx to ajakannya A'a Laguna yang beli tiket jam 20.30 dari jam 3 siang hihihihihi...

Sebenernya nonton X-Men 3 ini gue agak takut kecewa, mungkin karena basically gue cukup tau X-Men dan marvel Comics, dan mengingat apa yang terjadi dengan yang namanya adaptasi dari buku/novel/komik, kadang-kadang beda dengan harapan.

Gagal harapan gue dari X-Men 1:
1. No colorful costume
2. Tokohnya dibuat dengan sedikit twist berbeda. Di cerita asli, Rogue digambarkan sebagai seorang mutant penyerap tenaga dengan kekuatan extra, yaitu invulnerability (kekebalan tubuh), Super-strength, dan terbang (yang semua ini diserap dari seorang mutant bernama Ms.Marvel AKA Carol Danvers).
Storm digambarkan sebagai seorang mutant yang berasal dari Afrika. Tokoh utama yang seharusnya menjadi akar X-Men adalah Professor X, Scott Summers AKA Cyclops, Jean Grey AKA Marvel Girl, Warren Worthington AKA Angel, Ororo Munroe AKA Storm, Henry McCoy AKA Beast, Logan AKA Wolverine, Bobby Drake AKA Iceman, Kurt Wagner AKA nightCrawler (yang ternyata adalah anak dari Raven Darkholme AKA Mystique), Piotr Rasputin AKA Collosus.

Tapi X-Men 1 cukup entertaining, sebagai pilot project Stan Lee untuk mengangkat salah satu kelompok Super-Hero paling hebat yang punya anggota cukup banyak untuk bikin kampung sendiri.

Gagal harapan gue dari X-Men 2:
1. Tokoh-tokohnya kurang digali. Mungkin karena keterbatasan waktu jadi sisi-sisi dalem tokoh-tokohnya ga keluar.
2. Kurang banyak mutant yang keluar.

And here comes the big bang....

X-Men 3: the Last Stand.(I'm gonna be a bit formal bo!)

Di film ini digambarkan bahwa kekecewaan seorang ayah yang memiliki anak mutant, sehingga ia sekuat tenaga berusaha merubah menjadi apa yang dia inginkan. Warren Worthington III AKA Angel, salah satu pentolan X-Men dalam versi komik, adalah seorang mutant yang memiliki sayap putih bersih yang mengijinkan dirinya untuk terbang bagaikan burung. Warren juga memiliki kekuatan luar biasa.

Ayah Warren menemukan obat penetralisir kekuatan mutant yang didapat dari Leech, seorang mutant anak-anak yang dapat menetralisir kekuatan mutant yang berada dalam radius jangkauan kekuatannya. Di Komik, Leech merupakan salah satu mutant bawah tanah yang dikepalai oleh Callisto.

Obat penetralisir ini tentunya menimbulkan beberapa respon yang berbeda-beda, dan terutama respon keras dari Eric Lansherr AKA Magneto dan Brotherhood of Evil Mutants.
Upaya Magneto untuk berusaha menggagalkan upaya ayah Warren dan pemerintah untuk mengeluarkan obat ini menimbulkan perseteruan dengan tim Xavier AKA X-Men, yang saat ini diketuai oleh Ororo AKA Storm.

Cyclops yang masih merasa terpukul atas kematian Jean Grey, akhirnya memutuskan untuk mencari sumber dari hubungan telepati yang dia dapatkan dari Jean. Jean yang muncul kembali dari kematian di dalam sungai, secara tidak disadari membunuh Cyclops.

Jean telah diambil alih oleh sebuah bentuk jiwa bernama Phoenix. Dalam komik, Phoenix adalah seorang jiwa yang mendatangi Jean sebagai upaya untuk mengambil alih tubuhnya. Kekuatan Phoenix, seperti halnya burung api, dapat memanifestasi kekuatan telekinetiknya seperti api dan membentuk sebuah burung api raksasa.Di akhirnya, Cyclops dan Jean menikah dan memiliki anak dengan kekuatan Phoenix, yaitu Rachel Summers.

Dalam versi film ini, Phoenix merupakan bagian dari kepribadian Jean yang terkurung atas usaha Charles Xavier yang memiliki kekuatan yang jauh luar biasa dari kekuatan Jean seharusnya.

Phoenix yang memiliki jiwa iblis akhirnya membunuh Charles Xavier, ketika ia berusaha menyelamatkan Jean dalam diri Phoenix.

Phoenix pun akhirnya mengikuti jejak Magneto, Pyro, Callisto yang berusaha untuk mencari dan membunuh Leech di laboratorium Worthington.

Logan AKA Wolverine AKA "Wolvie" dan Storm akhirnya mengumpulkan sisa anggota X-Men, untuk menghadang Magneto. Beast, Collosus, Shadowcat, dan Iceman merupakan satu-satunya harapan masyarakat dari ancaman Magneto.

Yang cukup asik dari film ini, Storm cukup menggunakan kekuatan elemental nya untuk terbang, apalagi dengan model baru rambut pendeknya. Mungkin yang mengecewakan adalah sedikitnya tokoh dan adanya twist dari tokoh tersebut.

Jamie Madrox AKA Multiple Man digambarkan sebagai angota Brotherhood, padahal seharusnya dia adalah anggota X-Men muda yang akhirnya berpindah menjadi X-Factor.
Tokoh-tokoh seperti Syrin AKA Terry Cassidy, Moira McTaggert, Betsy Braddock AKA Psylocke, kurang digali.

Kalo musti pilih, X-Men 3 emang paling top. Ceritanya lebih dramatis...lebih gelap...dan lebih banyak action....

Moral story juga ada, gimana kadang dunia suka ga terima perbedaan-perbedaan yang ada, otak manusia suka sempit...dan gimana kita bisa lebih dewasa untuk trima perubahan dan perbedaan yang ada....

Semoga ada X-Men 4!

many faces of me....i Guess

2006-05-20T02:53:00.000+07:00

See friendster:

Testimonial terakhir dari seorang temen SMA....

*ga deket-deket amat juga sih*

She said:

"kamu ceria terus ya?"

and then dalam bentuk kebingungan, gue hanya bisa naikkin alis dan nyoba analisa sendiri...

1. TKA belom selese....

2. Bosen sama kerjaan....

3. My visa bill is HUGE!!!!!!

4. Romance?? Nuff said!!!

yang bener cuma hubungan gue dengan orang-orang terdekat aja....

And where did she get off ya?

and then testimonial itu gue reply...

"He? yang terlihat diluar ga berarti di dalemnya gitu kok! But I can still manage!"

Not much of a happy-go-lucky guy juga kan gue...

hatiku senang.riang gembira...

2006-05-14T22:38:00.000+07:00

Senangnya...

Berkat abang spesial yang pake kaos pink dan kacamata baru yang membuat umur dia turun 7 poin itu.....hehehehhehe

aku bisa pasang foto!

*dasar computer illiterate*

hihihihihihi......

Buat yang punya blog indigoville....thanx udah bawa dia bertemu akkuuuuuuh!

hehehhehehehhe

CLOBBERED

2006-05-13T00:31:00.000+07:00

It started as a typical good day....

Woke up at 10, went to the office at 1, ate a few pizza (courtesy of Rasjid's last day teaching), did some paperwork for my classes on Monday.

Went home...picked up my mom at the salon...did a bit of pampering...

*hehehehe...great day..*

I was so bored at home,decided to go to my counselor on Sunday...
called a friend,and we decided to hang out together...

For some of my bestfriends who know me with every bit of detail, I am a very curios guy....

DONT EVER TALK IN RIDDLES IN FRONT OF ME...I could haunt you forever...

But just tonite, I found out somewhat rather bizzare cold hard truth about one of my bestfriend, who I thought she was my bestfriend, when I discovered thatI was being double-crossed, I was deceived...

I was stabbed in the back...by someone who I would never thought be capable to do so...whom I share a great deal of joy and happiness, sadness and grief...who was someone that I could turn to whenever I needed a shoulder to cry on...

*how i knew this...ehm,i think its for me and a few of my bestfriends to know...*

When I knew this, I almost felt like someone just vacuum the air in my lungs...couldnt sob in public...so, courtesy of Chorie and Kemal...

*template 1 & 2 ajaaaaah*

I waited for Lissa to show up, and went to Langsat on Ahmad Dahlan...

*great sandwich btw...*

I told her what happened, somehow was still amazed that one of my bestfriend could actually do such a thing...

If I could cry at that moment, I would...

I asked Baby to call me up on my Esia, and told her everything...

She wasnt really surprised that I would react that way...and for a fact I will see HER tomorrow in my high-school gathering...

I asked Baby to slap me..just in case I couldnt use template 1 & 2.....

"Bo,mungkin emang dari insiden itu, DIA emang lebih memilih ke arah orang-orang itu instead of you." Baby said.

"And why the lie? Kenapa dia ngga bisa jujur? Buat apa dia bikin gue menduga-duga that she was actually being honest and sincere about stuff?"tanya gue.

"Yang gue bingung, lain halnya kalo dia being fair...tapi ini, she crossed-over my part, but she has never crossed over their part." I continued with a bit of angry tone.

"Iya sih! Gue jadi loe sumpah gondok banget." baby said.

"Bo, gue mungkin ga peduli kalo itu cuma temen aja yang mau nusuk gue dari belakang, tapi maksud gue ini DIA, yang gue kira adalah sahabat gue yang support gue...orang-orang yang gue percayain hidup gue."

"Sama kaya loe, ato Cici, ato Angga, ato Alfi...orang-orang yang emang tau gue inside-out." I continued.

Baby understood where i was coming from with those statements of mine...

We ended our phone conversation and I started talking to Lissa...

"Bo, u've been through a lot sama dia, loe deket banget sama dia, bahkan sama keluarganya, sekarang loe akan waste hal itu karena ini?" asked Lissa.

Before I answered, she pointed out...

"Masa 10 tahun loe sahabatan ama dia, dan dia orang pertama yang "tau" elo luar-dalem, mau loe sia-siain?" she continued to bomb me with questions.

"Bo, gue bukan orang yang pretentious....been there once...kayanya pretentious cuma buang-buang tenaga, jadi buat apa? Maybe dia akan masih jadi temen gue, tapi bukan sahabat gue. As always, sebetulnya I have seen the signs...but I was being a good bestfriend,and I chose to ignore sign-sign yang mengarah bahwa kayanya banyak dari dia yang ga jujur dan diumpetin. Tapi sekarang gue liat/baca dengan mata kepala gue sendiri, buat apa gue musti bo'ongin diri gue sendiri that she is still my bestfriend?" I explained to Lissa.

"Cuma sayang aja kan menurut gue...mungkin bisa dibenerin." said Lissa.

"I should've known dari awal that this wasnt mendable. Bo, ada hal-hal dari dia yang gue keep untuk diri gue sendiri, dan ga gue coba bahas ke yang lain...tapi sekarang kok gue jadi ngerasa bertepuk sebelah tangan?"

Lissa kept silent...I think she knew that my mind was totally made up.

One thing I know for sure...

I've been disappointed once....or twice....in my proffesional life...and romance....believe me...clobbered and disappointed...

But to think that I was clobbered and disappointed by my own bestfriend...
Way ahead of my limitation...
I dont want to get clobbered or disappointed in friendship...
I love my bestfriends so much....and to think that one of them would actually disappoint me..

*hmpppfff*
hiks....hiks....

Hiks

2006-05-07T02:13:00.000+07:00

Ironic comedy...

Last night...Everything just went wrong...

And it was filled with drama...at least my own anyways...

Rosamaria came over...and babbled about this relationship...and as stupid as it might seem...I kinda envy that situation of Rosa and the significant other.

Planning on going to my Final Assignment Counselor at 5...Just when I prepared everything...and planning on going...

*VOILA*

None of the cars are available...
And I was given a stupid excuse by my own father, that it was so riddiculous even to comprehend!

SOOOOOO...what happened?

I asked ASEP (my trusty maid-ty) to take me to Mira's place by his motorbike...
So then i went...got there at 5ish...Went to Ds.Limo...

*so far away in nowhere-land*

By the time I got there with Mira, Anis was there....and apparently my lecturer hadn't come home yet...

So,Anis took the liberty to texted him, and then the reply...

"I am at Tebet right now, and I will be finished with my meeting at 8pm!"

and it was 6.15 at that time...this nowhere-land had become darker....and darker....and darker....and darker....

SO we decided to head back...

As I was home, My mom and I had a slight stupid argument...

I stormed in to my room...read a text from Fadly saying...

"Just got back from dufan with anak-anak BN!"

*Geez...thanx a lot fad...that was all i need*

For those of you who do not know what BN is...well...you dont need to...

PS: Bang Wis...miss yaaaah....

ANNNND....the worst part is...I really felt lonely....and sobbed...

*Cici, i'm sure u'll read this...and I'M SURE you would like to UNDERLINE my DQ crits happily*

Then, I took a shower...planning on some pain-reliever activities for tonight...

*aside from the fact that my bestfriends were occupied with their own errands*

Called Avinkeu first....and we got to talk for 10 minutes just to catch up a bit,and laughed a little...

*Avin, one of the poisonous-sai-tongue family....huahuahuahuahu*

Took the car for a drive....alone....from home...to Sudirman....and not even my favorite cheekiest song could cheer me up...

*Britney Spears-Anticipating*

Took the liberty to text mira Kurnia, and we decided to meet up at dimsum festival...

As I was driving to dimsum, I realized that I was really that pathetic. It was Saturday nite,and instead of having a fun time with lotsa people,i was busy feeling sorry for myself. I was caught up with this whole facaad,that only I could understand why it appeared.

Even after the dinner at dimsum, I still felt lonely.

Dont get me wrong...I love my friends...I do...

But sometimes there are things that can only be understood by yourself...and THIS....LAST NITE...was one of them.

Eveyone kept telling me to jump into the pool...

*not literally of course*

Everyone kept telling me try to open up....which obviously they know that I'm closing down something...

Sometimes I do get things that are merely opinions from shoes that arent mine...

I am idealist...too idealist...I freak out a lot...I am not confident about myself...

I always feel that I am inadequate to anyone...

I cover myself with this image of BITCHY or somewhat high-opinionated...

That's the only thing that keeps me from getting hurt...
Twice is probably enough...and the hurt keeps eating me alive...
I do admire my bestfriends who channel hurt in so many different ways...

But I can only channel my hurt by trying to protect myself excessively...
In general...I am not a risk-taker...in my proffesional life nor my personal life...

my character

2006-05-05T13:15:00.000+07:00

Your name begins with T:

Kamu sensitif dan menyukai pasangan yang dapat mengambil bagian.

Kamu cenderung untuk berkhayal dan mudah jatuh cinta.

Dalam cinta, kamu romantis dan idealistik.

Kamu penggoda yang baik dan yang ada dalam kepala kamu adalah bagaimana kamu dapat membuat hubungan sesuai mimpi.

Kamu menyukai jalan sendiri.

Kamu tidak menyukai perubahan dan kamu menyukai bergantung dalam kondisi yang sama. Kamu perlu mendengarkan apayang orang lain katakan meskipun kamu tidak ingin mendengarnya, nasihat mereka mungkin menyelamatkan cintamu.

anjrit...dan itu semua bener aja gituh....

duh gara-gara email Wina nih....

sebel....

Anyway....thanx ya Win!

Judes dan Jutek

2006-04-29T10:39:00.000+07:00

talk about my stupid self defense mechanism....

Yang tau juga orang-orang di sekitar gue....

bagi orang-orang yang ngga nyadar...dan ngga tau...mungkin kaget....

*contoh....cek friendster gue...dan liat testimonial terakhir*

Self-defense mechanism that can appear in circumstances where i would be most uncomfortable with the enviroment....

This SDM can also appear whenever I would despise the person i talk to...at that time....

and that SDM would be...

*JUDES AND JUTEK*

mau diapain juga...ini udah susah ilang.....

I hate being pretentious....i can only say things that come to mind...at that time...which sometimes arent always good things....

I re-act...according to what i have heard...seen...or felt.....

Contoh kasus...

Kamis kemaren, i found out about a big scandal...

*dan gue telat tau nya*

from people at work...they were dating...but it was over by the time we found out that the girl is married and had a 2 year-old baby already....

*why someone would cheat in a relationship is beyond me*

But at that time, she felt good telling me the story....it was as if she was proud of what she had accomplished...

which were...getting a hot-bule guy...fooled around a bit...without ever letting her husband knew....

*ya iyyaaaaalah...namanya juga selingkuh begOOOOO!*

my initial reaction were:

*BITCH....SLUT....hebat loe!!!!!!*

*Suami loe ga tau bo?????* dan dia jawab engga.....

*U slept with him didnt u???* dan dia bilang ngga.....

TAHEEEEEEEK.....

I cant say that i was proud....she was a bit psychotic if i may say so myself....

Arrrrghhhh.....

Dan JUDES gue keluar....ngeri ah....

kalo kata CICI gue...judes gue kadang kelewat batas....

tapi apa iya ya????

knowing me

2006-04-26T11:26:00.000+07:00

Betapa kangennya gue dengan beberapa Nyionyia penting dalam hidup gue...

apalagi Sabtu kemaren gue ditinggal mereka...

Ada yang ke Bandung, ada yang ke Singapore ama pacarnya, ada yang maen-maen ndiri ama temen2nya...

tapi hari Senin, gue merengek...

"Cici...Kamu pulang jam brapa? Aku ke kost kamu ya?" tanya gue...

"Bo loe mau cerita apa sih sebetulnya?" tanya Cici-ku...

Sebetulnya ga ada yang signifikan yang mau gue utarakan sama mereka...cuma kangen aja mungkin...

OR...

They know me toooooooo well....everytime rengekan gue muncul, pasti ada sesuatu yang pengen gue critain sama mereka...

Selasa...

Siangnya pergi sama Mira Kurnia...shopping spree murah di tempat favorite....POSITIF OUTLET di arteri Pd.Indah....

*which gue inget gue harus ngajak Adhit kesana....he'll go balistic*

Sore jemput Cici-ku di kantornya...Herry dan Pungky lagi sibuk...dan Ceceu itu ada date...yang katanya bukan orang signifikan...

*hmpppff....ngedate tapi minta cariin gue pacar...bete*

Cici itu dengan berbagai caranya berusaha mengorek hal-hal yang bothering my mind lately...which obviously dia realized bahwa there was something bothering me...

*again....THEY KNOW ME TOOO WELL*

satu kalimat CEceu gue ditelfon...

"Loe ga mungkin ga suka sama orang itu kalo loe terus ngebahas dia deh....hayoo....I know u too well!"

*great*

Ake and Angela were tehre too...

and as always....gue jadi bulan-bulanan mereka...dengan beberapa topik:

-golden gals
-mimpi basah *ewwwww*
-beberapa nama baru dalam hidup gue
-FRIGID MODE
-bla bla bla....

But...as always....miss them that way.....

boX of ChocoLate

BULLIES SUCK!

office party

HMMPPPPFFFFF

BLOON

presenting V aka Vanessa Hudgens

CRIMINAL MINDS, starworld Mondays at 9pm

MOVIE

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

lame and pathetic...

ME

GLORIA JEANS

REJECTION

L.O.L

LIARS liar pants ON FIRE!!!

NEW

to choose or not to choose

my fave CSI teams

AH HAH

a moment of *sigh*

QUESTIONS!

OVER IT!

HAIRDO

FUN WEEKEND!

Detective (rank III) Calleigh DuQuesne

MOODSWING goin SOUTH!

STARF**Ks

we're your dreamGIRLS,BooooYYYy!

STUPID!

Unbelievable--Craig David

CONSUMED!

TAGGED by mr.Rush

SH*T happens!

;-p

JEN HUDSON!!!!

Kisser/Cynical!

valentine's dinner

THE HOLIDAY

Blog for the heartache

February 14th!!!!!!

orang orang aneh

SIGH!

ALL HELL BREAKS LOSE!

banjir aja gitu

CAPE BANGET

COngrats Ms.Hudson!

current Occurances

tontonan 2007 ku

Lelah

empty!

PR dari Hary yang musti diisi

DAMNNNNNNNNNNNNNED

membekas

hirup napas dan lepas

FIUHHHHHH

peringatan dari Tuhan

Nicole Scherzinger

my so-called normal Thursday

NUMBERS

on the line

having no one

HIKS

Clay Aiken

SICK n TIRED

POLIGAMI/SELINGKUH

Birthday Wish

TOUGH

too little too late

doink doink doink

smirking

dilematis

sorry.........

-sebel-

emotional dependency

what's left of me

dugem moeloe....

ME

quote of the week

wheel of life

Tim KijMer FiSip UI '99

a moment of sigh